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House of memory, 2023-24
In the series House of Memory, I explore the impermanence of memories and how they are shaped by longing and personal experiences.
Memories don’t simply vanish. They linger quietly, like faint echoes in the corners of the mind, shifting shape as time passes. Details soften, edges blur, and emotions take on different hues. New experiences seep in, altering the original texture of the memory.
In the act of recalling, the memory bends and folds, sometimes breaking apart, sometimes returning in unexpected forms. What remains is not a fixed picture but a mosaic, constantly rearranging itself, an ever-shifting reflection of the past.
I drift between different forms—drawing, painting, words, photography, video—as if moving through rooms in a house I seem to recognize but can never fully map. Each medium becomes a passage, a translation from one state of being to another.
personal images shaped by the rhythm of remembering, forgetting and rediscovery. A process of reassembling pieces of something that’s already changing, even as I try to hold it still.
Through these shifting channels, fragments of memory resurface, intertwine, gradually being rediscovered and emerge as something both familiar and entirely new.
I need blacks
blank moments
traces
an absence of presence
i want to slow down time
to see the spaces in between
and construct my own reality.
Figure of an early morning
Every time I look through a window,
I notice a boundary, as well as an opening
A new horizon opens up that lets in light
but also a sense of impermanence.
It is a structure
within which the subject recognizes itself,
or where it gazes longingly outward?
Travelling memory
There is no direct road between these different places
Just a rambling network of country lanes
that seem to make no difference which way I go
as long as it is generally in the right direction.
And so through repeating
I keep crossing and recrossing alternative roads
passing objects of places
that look familiar
but at the same time are new.
Yet I have a few routes I prefer
They intuitively feel more direct to what I want to see
Every combination, color, or form
combines differently with the next
bringing me closer to places I haven’t been yet.
Poetics of memory
Family memory portraits, 2021-22
This project provides a different angle to my research on the impermanence of memory.
I began this project after going through some family pictures. While examining these pictures, I discovered that some family members look very different in contemporary reality than in my memories, as if these memories are 'frozen' in time.
In my mental image of my mother, she has chestnut brown hair, as she did during my teenage years, while her actual hair color at that time was white. This highlights the tensions between the static nature of certain memories and the dynamic, constantly changing reality of others. In this case, the fixation of memories in my mind is not subject to the development we observe in daily life, which leads me to wonder how and why some memories remain so fixed, even as the people and situations around us continue to change.
The image above captures a memory
from the day I saw a peculiar bird glide into my garden
The moment held a sense of magic,
as if time hesitated for a breath.
I’d never seen such a bird before,
and it struck me as extraordinary,
especially here, in the heart of Amsterdam.
Later that evening,
another strange thing happened.
I was watching a film—
the title escapes me now,
though I think it might have been Fassbinder.
In a quiet, unremarkable family scene,
there it was again:
the same bird,
hovering silently in the background,
as though it had followed me
from one reality into another.
My mind shifting back and forth between two worlds
Fountainhead, Ayn Rand
